Could graduation come any sooner? I wish.

People seem to always say going through high school isn't living in the real world. Well if it isn't the real world, it must be somewhere in between because it sure as heck isn't a fantasy world. It's harder than given credit for, and granted, I know college will be a million times harder. But still, the STUPID drama, and the unneeded pressure... it's ridiculous. I don't go to school everyday to hear from teachers how much I suck blah blah blah. The thing is... I KNOW who I am. Those who like to cut me down, it does nothing. I know what I've put into my high school years, and I know I've dedicated my heart and my time. I cannot control what other's do, or what they DON'T do. I just feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders and graduation just seems way too far away. I just cant wait to the day where the drama ceases, but then again, it might not ever. I HATE pointless conversations and can't stand people who live to get rises out of others and stir up trouble. I just wish someone could come up and say "hey, all this crap will disappear when you go to college." Unfortunately though, life isn't that simple. 

Anyways... besides stupid things, life is pretty darn good. And march, has been an amazing month! Yes I've got the boyfriend still, gasp! It's only been a month, but a pretty darn entertaining and fun filled month. From pillow fights to trips to Kemah, its been non stop fun! He's pretty awesome, so be jealous :-P. And as for FFA... honestly I'm just ready to give my retiring address and leave it in the past. I love FFA, but I feel like it's just something that I need to leave in the past.

I see college as new beginnings. New friendships, new home. New everything, except for me. I'll always be me, no matter where I am. A&M is huge, and thats just what I need. Somewhere where I'm not put on spot or singled out. I just want... to start over. My senior year is ending on a sour note in a few areas, but what can I do? Nothing, so I'm just going to let it roll off my shoulder and think about the possibilities of my future. I think that's what gives us all a little push to keep going, knowing that eventually, it'll all be alright. While writing this I came upon this quote and it seemed to answer all my unspoken questions and worries...


Ask yourself this question:
"Will this matter a year from now?"
Richard Carlson, writing in Don't Sweat the Small Stuff


 Until next time... Gig em'!



Meagan <3

Boyfriends and college

BELIEVE! Just check out the quote above ^^^, it's inspiring, and right now I'm in a believing mood, but that might have something to do with listening to journey!!!! I haven't posted a blog in a while, but boy I've been a busy girl. Ya know life... it never stops to let you catch a break! It just happens and you gotta go along with it. 


Yeah so... I've went and got myself a boyfriend. Say what?! Yeah I know, weird. I've never claimed normality though! Remember that one blog where I said if a good guy came around that I'd date him? Yeah well he came around :-) It's good, and he's awesome lol, a real gentleman. I'm definitely happy I've met him. Too bad he couldn't have showed up whenever I was ranting about my lack of a date for valentines day ^_^, oh well! But anyways... I've got a good feeling about him, so we'll see what happens!!


Besides that, I've been busier than heck with school and FFA, which is driving me bananas!! I just keep telling myself three more months till graduation! Then six until I leave for college station, which as it looms closer is becoming a scarier thought. I don't really know if I'm ready to leave so soon. It's a scary thought, being away from everyone I've grown up with, especially my mom, whom I considered one of the people I'm closest to in my life. Just knowing that I'll be two hours away, with no one I know, makes me feel extremely lonely. Everyone will be here, living their lives like they have for years, and I'll be starting a new chapter in my life, without them. It terrifies me, and six months just does not seem long enough to deal with that fear. But the thing is, I know that I have to try and get out of the nest, to try and start a new life. It's a part of growing up and learning. And if I don't get out there and do it now, I might never, and that'll take away new experiences that I need to have. I don't know maybe I'll get up to college station and freak out and transfer home as soon as possible. But then again, I might get up there, love it, and realize it's where I need to be. I won't know until I go. I won't know for another six months. But for the next six months, I plan to spend as much time as possible with the people I love. I want memories to look upon when I first start out at College station to help get me through the lonely part. 


People keep telling me I'll get up to A&M and forget about them. That's one thing I will NOT let happen. The thought of that terrifies me more than anything else. The people in my life are there for a reason, and losing them would kill me. So thats why I'm deciding now that I won't let it happen. If I keep that mentality, I'll do fine. Plus I've got God to help me. So it'll be all good, hopefully.


In six months, my life will change drastically. Am I ready? Can I handle it? No matter what my answer is to those questions, I've got to face reality. On the plus side though, I've got a date to prom now! And it's someone I'd actually enjoy going with! Guess thats a plus from getting a boyfriend! Coming up is spring break, senior portraits, prom, then graduation. It's insane how time is flying. Oh well I can't really think of anything else to write about for now, so this is gonna be it for a week or so probably. Until next time....




Meagan <3